Conspiracy Theories That Nobody Cares About

August 20, 2009 at 9:05 pm Leave a comment

Sarcastic

1) The Government Has A Plan To Make A DOOMSDAY DEVICE!!!! out of unmatched socks.
They suck them up through a tube in the back of the washer. Yeah, I know, these are some sick and scary times we live in.

2) Instant mashed potatoes taste better than real mashed potatoes!!!
Why would they lie? To keep Idaho farm workers employed. It’s all a union / government back door deal to keep you eating the brain control chemicals that can only be found in the skin of potatoes. Why else would Wendy’s only offer baked potatoes and not au gratin when everyone knows that cheese makes them better?

3) The Culinary Taxonomy of recipes and dishes is arbitrary and doesn’t actually reflect the true historical origins of dishes and often incorporates ingredients that were not available in the regions that the dish is supposed to be associated with!!!!
You don’t believe me? Try going to a Korean restaurant and a Japanese restaurant… They’re the same thing!!! OMG Proof!

4) If you throw trash in the water we’ll FUCKING KILL YOU!!!!

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Entry filed under: Evil.

The Magna Carta Is Just Toilet Paper If You’re A Kennedy FREE FREE FREE!!!

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